Not much to say

Sorry, but there's not a whole lot going on around here. Yesterday I spent most of my day busily working on some homemade Christmas gifts. I would post pictures but you never know who might look at my blog and who the gifts might be for! hee, hee. Today I've been puttering around the house trying to pick up, AGAIN, and baking cookies. Our upstairs neighbor is sick so I thought I'd take her some cookies, probably chicken soup would be more helpful but cookies just taste SO much better! Also, the CERN dancing club has a little monthly party after our class tonight and it's "Canadian" style - which means bring some food to share. They have one every month and we have yet to attend so we thought we'd hang out for a bit tonight and see what it's like. Maybe we'll get to know some people in our class a little bit better, that'd be nice.
Isn't it funny that a bring a dish to pass type event is called a Canadian - I love it. It makes me laugh every time I see it or hear it. I think we should start instituting that phrase in the States. I wonder how the Canadians would feel about that? I mean why Canadians? are they the cheapskates of the world who ask their guests to bring food for their parties? I have no idea why they call them Canadian parties, and neither does our Canadian neighbor.
So, sorry I'm not more full of rollicking good stories or witty criticisms about life, but things are bit dull at the moment as I busily work away at completing my Christmas projects in the hopes of getting them sent off in time to make it to their destinations by Christmas - fat chance o this happening so sorry to anyone who might receive a gift - but I'll try my darnedest. Darnedest, what a great word.
OK, so I'm going to get back to my projects if anything exciting happens this weekend you'll be the first to know.

Ciao!

Roue de secours

that is the newest word/phrase I have learned. It means spare tire, or more literally wheel of help. I learned this, not because I needed to use my spare, but because we were already using it. Yes, tragically, when Josh arrived at CERN after our wedding - way back in September - he discovered our car had a flat tire (he had left the car at CERN, then taken the bus to the airport - I had left before him and returned after him). Lucky for me, unlucky for Josh. He was stuck changing a tire after an 8 hour flight and feeling the massive jet-lag of a 6 hour time difference. To compound on that he didn't have a jack and had to wait for one of his officemates to get to work so he could borrow hers. Poor guy. Yet, I'm so glad that it wasn't me. I probably would have just sat down in the middle of the parking lot and balled my eyes out until a security guard came and took me away to the loony bin. But that's me; not him.

So, as you might have guessed we've been driving around on this spare tire for the past few months. Perhaps not the brightest thing to do, especially when the car started to sort of vibrate from the tire not being quite round, but the simplest and least expensive thing to do. This past weekend we finally got around to finding an auto shop and seeing about getting the leak in our old tire fixed. Unfortunately, the tire was so bad - bald on one edge - the guy there said, "No. eet eez no gewd." (think English with a strong French accent) We found him to be very nice, as most of the Frenchies we've met are, and to speak very good English, despite the fact, like every other French person when asked if they speak English say "a leetle, but verry bahd" (again think thick French accent- it's much funnier in my head I'm sure). And then they proceed to speak excellent English that puts my attempts at 4 year old French to shame.
But, I digress. We made an appointment for 2 new front tires and yesterday I braved this crazy French world and went to the appointment sans husband (without husband, for you non-French speakers). It really wasn't hard at all. I got to practice my French with the very patient gentleman, who speaks wonderful English despite his former protests, and learned a few words in the process. The word for tire is pneu - pronounced like new, as far as I can tell. And I already told you about le roue de secours. So, all in all, it was a good day.
Our car runs much smoother now that we have two proper front tires again. And with my limited French and his English I was able to communicate which tires we wanted changed and how we wanted to keep the semi-good front tire for our spare (that's how I learned the French word for spare tire).

Yep, it was a good day. And I ended it by making a fabulous dinner. I am getting a bit better at this stuff. Granted, I completely forgot about preparing, or even planning, side dishes - I was too focused on making my duck - until Josh asked what else was for dinner. Oops. But, with his help we managed to pull off a very good meal that I would recommend to any duck enthusiasts.

DUCK BREAST WITH DRIED CHERRY SAUCE

• 1/2 cup red wine
• 1/2 cup lower-sodium chicken broth
• 1/2 cup dried cherries
• 1 tablespoon red wine vinegar
• 1 tablespoon sugar
• 3 boneless duck breasts, about 21 ounces
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 to 2 tablespoons butter (optional) 1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees; coat a baking dish with cooking spray.
  
  2. Combine red wine, chicken broth, cherries, vinegar and sugar and set aside.
  
  3. With the tip of a sharp knife, score the skin of the breasts to form diamond shapes. Sprinkle the breasts with salt and pepper.
  
  4. Heat a large, nonstick skillet over medium high; add the duck breasts, skin-side down, and cook 4 minutes. Turn and cook another 4 minutes. Transfer to the prepared baking dish and finish cooking the duck in the oven for 10 minutes.
  
  5. Meanwhile, pour off all but 1 tablespoon of the fat in the pan. Reduce the heat to medium and add the liquid mixture. Boil for 8 minutes, or until the sauce is thick and a spoon drawn across the pan makes a line. Remove from heat and swirl in the butter, if desired.
  
  6. Cut duck across into thin slices; fan on plate and top with sauce to serve. Makes 4 servings.

Now, that was the recipe I found on-line, but I modified it a bit and it still turned out great. First off, I couldn't find any dried cherries, so I used dried cranberries instead - not exactly the same, but I like cranberries and it tasted fine to me. Second, I didn't have 3 duck breasts, I just had one, yet I still made the full serving of sauce. We had rice with our duck and the sauce tasted just as yummy on rice as on duck. And third, my sauce never thickened up. Yeah, it reduced down, but it was still liquid with chunks of mushy dried cranberries in it -still tasted good though!

So, there you have it. Another day in the life of a foreigner in France. Lessons learned: 1)try to speak French and you might just learn some new words and 2) you can never find what you need in the grocery store so improvise. If you add enough red wine, everything tastes good!

"A little privacy, please!"

p.s.

I love the people who knit matching sweaters for themselves and their pets. You just wonder what they are truly like, don't you? I mean Josh and I saw this little chihuahua in Paris that was running around in a leopard print vest and then around the corner comes a man in a matching leopard print vest and hat with leopard print trim - awesome. He scooped up the little dog and the matching duo was off. It's not just crazy Frenchies who like to have their dogs clothing match theirs -seriously, it's bizarre!

Cats in Sweaters

If you happen to have some massive time to kill and get a kick out of seeing animals dressed up you might want to check out this photo gallery. Drunk, divorced, and covered in cat hair contest
Honestly, some people are just too much. A blog that I read, Crazy Aunt Purl, sponsored a contest for knitters. You had to submit a photo of a knitted cat sweater - with a loose interpretation of cat and an even looser interpretation of sweater. Some of the pictures are hee-sterical, as Crazy Aunt Purl would say. There's even a chicken in a sweater!! Now that's what I call a loose interpretation of the word CAT. But I love it.
So, check it out if you have nothing better to do, like me.

Losing the war

that villain dirt is at it again. With his lieutenants; clutter, dog hair, and cobwebs who command the foot-soldiers, those pesky and indomitable dust bunnies. Does anyone else feel like they are fighting a huge war and losing every battle. Yeah, there are a few victorious skirmishes here and there but they are short lived and seemingly futile. I spent hours on Saturday, assisted by my DH, cleaning up the house. I went so far as to pull all the cushions off the couch and vacuum them. We swept, vacuumed, dusted and within in 2 hours after this massive effort took place the house was a disaster again. How is that possible?
Our household consists of two adults, a dog, and a part-time visitor in the form of a snaggle-toothed slobber hound. Yes, some of the disgusting stains on the floor can be attributed to that last slobbery being, but really it shouldn't be this hard to keep the house in decent shape. Yet, all signs point to the contrary. I sweep practically everyday sometimes more than once and still we have great rolling dust bunnies. It's ridiculous. I sweep and then an hour later I see this huge ball of dust and fur rolling down the hallway like tumbleweed across the desert. What gives? Is there anyone else out there who enters their house and just looks around in despair at the endless clutter?
Even when we owned barely two pieces of furniture our apartment was cluttered. If there is a table it is inevitably covered in papers, used Kleenex (disgusting, I know), electrical cords, boxes, books, and general crap. How is it ever to be tamed? Does anyone know a foolproof way of shaming your papers and junk into compliance?
I love when my brother-in-law says, "why bother? it's just going to get dirty again." What a great philosophy. And it's even better because he expresses this point of view to my mother. Who gags in indignation at the thought. I wouldn't be surprised if her head started spinning around every time he said something like that in her presence. The best part is that by comparison even my minimal efforts at cleanliness take on a glow of victory in the eyes of my mother. To my brother-in-law all I have to say is, "Keep up the good work."
With that I'm going to have to excuse myself there are some nasty cobwebs in the bathroom trying to overrun my defenses and engulf the shower, mirror and sink.

Once more into the fray!

Rejected Sainthood?

St. Hoshooua is in serious peril of losing his sainthood. Whilst he was speaking on the phone to, none other than his father, he kicked a ball into my face. Now, this could have been forgiven, as I believed it was an accident, BUT then he proceeded to whip the ball at me until I sought refuge in the bathroom. Yes, the shitter of ALL places was my safe haven. So, I have posted a poll and we shall have a fair vote as to whether the newly minted saint should retain his sainthood. I anxiously await your answers.

Dramatic reenactment of the inciting incident

*Don't forget to participate in the poll to your right*

Today's thought

yep, I said thought, not thoughts. I only have one a day. Don't try to push me to come up with more than one thought a day, it's hard enough as it is.
So, here it is. I just realized that as of this month Josh and I have been together 10 - TEN- years! Whooooaaa. That just seems crazy. And funny enough we've only been married for not quite 3 months. ha, ha. Who ever would have thought life would turn out this way. I certainly didn't think I'd end up meeting the man I'd marry when I was 18 years old. But I'm glad that I did and I'm glad that the saintly man (did I mention he just recently gained Sainthood?) stuck it out and is willing to stick out another 10 plus years with me. Yay for me.

*A brief public service announcement: In groundbreaking news there is a new saint in town, Saint Hoshooua, patron Saint of cranky, overly emotional wives. Coming soon to a store near you Saint Hoshooua medallions. Let your crazy wife take out this aggression by throwing this medallion around when in a temper. Life just wouldn't be complete without one. Callers are standing by for your order 1-800-mad-wife*

So there it is a thought for today PLUS a Public Service Announcement, aren't you lucky.

A day of Thanks

So, yesterday Josh and I joined our neighbor, Marion, on an excursion to Vevey. A town on the North side of lake Geneva right next to the resort town of Montreux. This area is apparently considered the "Swiss Riviera". As it was nearly 7p.m. when we got there, dark and rainy, I really have no idea if it's a cute little town or not. But, my suspicions are that it is and that we should go there in daylight to really check it out. Anyways, we went there to partake in a wonderful Thanksgiving feast with a group of Marion's friends. They were so nice and welcoming and it was very kind of them to invite us seeing as we'd never met any of them before!
It was a very international crowd, but we ate a very American dinner. Let's see there were 4 of us Americans, a Canadian (Marion), a Mexican, a Swede, a Peruvian, and an Iranian. It was wonderful! A good time was had by all. And dinner, naturally, consisted of a huge Turkey (cooked with the add of a pair of old boxer shorts covered in lips), stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, veggies, and applesauce.
You want to know how ridiculous I am? I took my camera with the express purpose of taking pictures so I could post them here, but I left my camera in my purse and didn't take a single picture all night! Then I left my purse in the apartment and almost drove an hour back home without it. Luckily, someone noticed it and stopped us before I left. The things a turkey food-coma will make you forget. Seriously, by 11:00p.m. all I could think of was getting home and into my comfy bed.
Our contribution to the Thanksgiving feast was garlic mashed potatoes and chocolate chip cookies. Yeah, yeah I know that cookies really aren't a Thanksgiving tradition, but I just didn't feel like making apple pie. It seemed such a hassle, although if I had bought a pre-made crust it probably would have been quicker and easier than making cookies. C'est la vie.
I have to give you the roasted garlic mashed potatoes recipe because it is just THAT good. So, here it is: for a serving of 4

• 4 Russet potatoes
• 2 heads of garlic
• 1/4 cup unsalted butter
• 1 cup 2% milk
• 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
• 1 tblsp dried thyme
• Salt & pepper to taste

Directions:

Peel the garlic leaving the cloves whole. Place them in a shallow baking dish. Drizzle with oil making sure to coat all the garlic. Sprinkle with the dried thyme. Bake at 350 degrees covered for 20 to 30 minutes or until tender and golden brown. Drain and save oil (great for sautéed vegetables).

Peel and cut the potatoes into quarters. Boil in salted water for 20-30 minutes or until tender. Meanwhile in a pot heat the milk and the butter. When the potatoes are done drain and return them to the same pot. Add the garlic then add the milk and butter a little at a time while mashing until desired consistency is achieved. Season potatoes with salt and pepper to taste.

My DH found this recipe on-line and he is a master at making it. The actually recipe also calls for a 1/2 cup of buttermilk added to the milk and butter mixture but we don't know how to find that here so we just eliminated it - everything still tasted great. I wonder what the buttermilk does? Isn't it usually added for reasons of acidity? Hmmm... I don't know and really who cares?

Oh, a funny thing happened. We met Marion in Nyon, a town about the halfway point between here and Vevey, left our car in the Migros parking lot and drove with Marion to Vevey. Migros, by the way, is a grocery store chain here. Anywho, when we went to get our car we found the parking lot closed - literally with a large red and white barrier that swings down and blocks the entrance and therefore also the exit. We stood there stunned for a minute staring at out little white fiesta sitting all alone in the middle of the deserted parking lot. We were thankful, at least, that it was still there and hadn't been towed away or something! We soon discovered that with a little forceful persuasion we could lift up the gate and get our car out. whew! what a relief. It would have sucked to have to drive a 1/2 hour back there this morning to get our car! So, we had lots to be thankful for despite the fact that it was a rainy, dreary day, and we were far from our families and close friends. We, thankfully, were surrounded by new friends and able to indulge in an orgy of comfort food, stuffing our faces till we hit the food-coma wall, then forcing in just one more dessert. All in all it was a day to be thankful for.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING !!!

I'm way too tired to write much at the moment so I'll just say "gobble, gobble and good-night"

thoughts on dancing with the stars

yeah, yeah, I know that I just posted like 30 minutes ago, but I just need to share with someone my thoughts on DWTS. First off, I'm not too surprised that Jennie and Derek got booted, but I am disappointed. I mean, Marie Osmond has a great personality and all, but she's been on the bottom for the last 3 weeks. How did the person with the lowest scores for 3 weeks straight make it to the finals? That's the fickle fiend of fate for you...or, more acurately, the voting public. Hey, don't blame me, I live in France I can't vote. I don't even get to see the shows until a day or two, sometimes more, after they've aired. So, it's your fault, not mine. But let us not reduce ourselves to blaming one another. Let's talk DWTS. It's not that I think Jennie Garth is fabulous or anything, but I was hoping that Derek would get a chance to choreograph a free style dance. I think that he'd do something pretty cool. I can't wait to see what the finalists will do. Maybe Marie Osmond will break-dance like Apollo Anton Ono did last season - that'd make me laugh till I cried.
My vote, so far, is for Mel B. 1.) she's got a great first name (hee, hee, hee) 2.) she's the only one who's gotten 30 THREE times (I think). and 3.) I think that she can do most any dance and do it well. I like Helio a lot, I mean who couldn't? He's sweet and kinda dorky and a very good dancer. But, there are some dances he just doesn't seem good at heelllloooo, remember the Rhumba? But, as he's the only non-performer out there- Josh pointed this out to me as the reason Helio should win - he's doing a damn fine job of putting on a great performance, not just a good technical dance. That is pretty impressive.
Oh and the #4 reason Mel B. should win: she used a WHIP in her last Paso doble!! You gotta love a girl with a whip.
So, that's my DWTS post for this week. For all of you who don't know what the hell I was just talking about just smile and nod ( that's what I do when I have no idea what's going on) and be thankful that next week is the finals. No more DWTS after that. boo hoo sniff, sniff.

the walk of death

Ah yes, the joys of walking 2 dogs at once! And yet, even though I'm being dragged along by these two beasts it doesn't stop people from rolling down there windows and asking directions. The sad part is that even though I've now been living here for about 7 months - yeah, it's been that long, I can't believe it - I have no idea where anything is, and even if I did know where the road was that they wanted I probably wouldn't understand them when they asked or be able to adequately explain if I did understand!

Josh said this picture looked like I was about to shoot the dogs! Ha, ha...but there are days the thought has crossed my mind. Well, maybe not actually shooting them but, you know....
I would have a picture of the most nerve wracking part of any walk with the dogs - l'espace de la mort: the gap of death, but I'm big chicken (more on that later). There is a section of the road that is very narrow, curves, and has stone walls on either side of the road this is what I have so fondly termed the gap of death , or l'espace de la mort when I'm feeling saucy and want to be more French. It seems as though EVERY time we are passing through the gap of death a car, inevitably, drives through at the same time! Now, rationally, I know that two cars can pass through this gap - I've seen it with my own two eyes. Yet, I can't help thinking we're going to be run down. Man, those two dogs take up nearly as much space as a car! Luckily I have yet to be caught with both dogs when TWO cars are going through. As I said you would have photographic evidence, but when I went to take a picture of it there were four people standing around teh apartment right next to l'espace de la mort and I felt stupid and silly taking a picture of it. So...I didn't. I just kept walking. Then when of the elderly gentlemen was walking a few feet behind me and I thought, "oh hell, now what am I going to do? I'll look stupid if I just turn around and walk back. But I don't want to walk all around the neighborhood, I just finished a walk with the dogs." So, like an idiot, I pretended that I was looking for something that I dropped until he was passed me then I turned around and scooted home. How dumb. When he passed he gave me a very bemused, "Bonjour!" and I just know he was snickering thinking, "silly foreigners." Ah well, I was acting silly and stupid and I didn't even get the picture that I wanted!!! Maybe tomorrow.
Hey, tomorrow's thanksgiving - yay! We've been invited by Marion, our Canadian neighbor, to join her in going to Vevey, Switzerland to celebrate with some of her friends and co-workers. It should be fun, even if it means two hours in the car (one hour there, one hour back). I'll let you know how it goes!
So, if I don't post tomorrow- Happy Turkey Day everyone.

A few small accomplishments

So, this weekend turned out to be a quiet weekend at, again, despite the fact that we had planned a busy weekend. We were going to go to a Milonga dance workshop on Saturday. The Milonga is, apparently, the simpler, faster dance that spawned the Argentine Tango. Our Tango teachers run these workshops every few months or so. I will digress here for a moment to gush over our Tango teachers, Paola and Domenico. I love them. They are just too cute and they think we're a step ahead of the rest of the class - at least my cutie Domenico does. I told Josh at our Friday night class that I wanted to give Domenico kisses. You might think this sounds like a strange comment to make to your husband about another man, but what I meant was those three little air kisses that Europeans always give each other in greeting and farewell. I always feel excepted when Europeans give me these little air kisses. Even though I know that they don't really mean anything here because people do it all the time, it's like a handshake, but I feel very European when I get a chance to give kisses! I know, I'm a dork, what can I say?
So, it turns out Paola's mother's sick so the workshop was canceled - postponed till next Sunday. I'll let you know how it goes (if I remember to post, that is). So that left Saturday open. So, we did a bunch of cleaning and rearranging and I knit a Christmas stocking for Josh! Isn't it soooo cute? I think it's adorable. I had to make it out of random yarn I had left or, thus the sort of random stripeyness - but I like it. When I added the lighter blue color I had a few misgivings because it suddenly became highly reminiscent of Hiram College's colors of red and Columbia blue (read powder blue) all that this little baby needs now to become an official Hiram stocking is to attach a little Terrier in a "Columbia" blue sweater vest!
Doesn't it look so perfect hanging by the fire? Now I just need to make one for myself.
So, that pretty much covers Saturday. Sunday we had planned to splurge by attending a Wine and Food fair in Villeneuve, Switzerland. It's about an hours drive on the opposite side of lake Geneva (or Lac Leman as it is known to the Swiss -which begs the question why do the English change the names of everything? Like English people can't say Leman? It's absurd...). Unfortunately, when I called half way through the week to reserve our tickets for this glutton fest I was informed it was full. Boohoo, I was so looking forward to strolling through the old city of Villeneuve where we would stop at 10 different locations and sample a variety of foods and wines at each place. Next year we are signing up well in advance. So, instead of a fun "European" wine and food orgy we hung out at home with a roaring fire all day. It was fairly cold, so maybe we were better off missing the festival - yeah, keep telling yourself that maybe some day you'll believe it! Instead I spent most of my day like this. Isn't Ally just the
cutest thing ever? Don't be jealous. I know she's the most adorable dog alive, but that doesn't mean your dog isn't cute too...just not as adorably cute as mine.
And this is the, "OK, stop taking pictures of me while I'm lying around like a sloth looking scuzzy and unkempt." You know you have given that look to your spouse before - or maybe you were the one receiving it! I did do a bit more than snuggle on the couch with Ally and a book. I made my first attempt at making Ratatouille - sort of vegetable soup popular in Provence. I figured while in France we should make some sort of effort to eat like the French. It turned out pretty well, although it's less like soup and more like large chunks of vegetables in very little liquid. Nonetheless is was eatable and I think we'll make it again.
Well, I know this has been incredibly exciting for you so I will leave you with a few pictures of my other great accomplishment of last week - pictures of my finished shawl! Yay! It only took me 7 months to make - oi vay.

Here's an extreme close-up so you can see the lace pattern. Here I am displaying my shawl.

Yes, that is Mickey mouse on my butt, and yes, I am still wearing my pajamas at 1:30pm on a Monday. Hey, don't get upset with me just because I have no social life. Not everyone is cut out for a life of slothfulness, a life devoid of human contact but full of doggy breathe. I'm sorry, I'm just lucky that way - truly, it's not my fault. Well, have a good day and I'll try to be better about posting for those desperate to read about my amazing life- ha, ha, ha

update continued....

Let's see, for those of you interested I shall continue with a run down of the weeks events.

Thursday: Joy of joys Josh took the day off from work and we headed into Geneva to see if we might get a little Christmas shopping done. Unfortunately, we weren't terribly successful but it was a fun day nonetheless. We decided to drive to CERN then grab the #9 bus down into Geneva. The disadvantages of driving right now is that there is massive road construction going on and the Genevoise are crazy. For example, if a major road in a city were under construction to the extent that there were multiple intersections where the stop lights were not in use any rational city would have workers directing traffic or put up a temporary light - not true in Geneva. It's a mad dash free for all. You just have to try and cross the intersection when you can. The buses are the worst, they just come barreling through. In fact, on Tuesday I nearly got run down by one as it careened around the corner trying to beat all the other traffic! So, it's advisable to be on the bus rather than driving next to at present. I want to take a moment here to state the bus system in Geneva is wonderful - it is definitely one of the good things about living in anther country. I wanted to take a picture but then I thought I might look like a crazy tourist lady taking pictures of everything in site, which in turn might make me a target for any stray pickpockets still wandering the city (they usually evacuate Geneva in the winter as it's the summer months that attract tourists). We went to Bel Air cité ,
which is the main shopping district in Geneva. Naturally, it has all the normal clothing & toy stores you'd find in any city along with all the high end, designer label stores with employees who look askance at you if you enter in your obviously hand-knitted wool hat and scarf and look like a pennyless waif. I know you'll find it surprising to learn we avoided these stores. Although we weren't entirely successful in finding gifts for other people we did succeed wonderfully in buying stuff for ourselves! Isn't that terrible? We go out looking for gifts and we mainly get things for us! Granted, a needed pair of gloves for Josh and a new pair of knitting needles for me isn't exactly extravagant, but it wasn't exactly to purpose of our trip. After wandering through shop after shop in search of those oh so elusive fabulous Christmas gifts we decided we'd had enough of the cold, the wind, and the shopping and headed home.
This is our standard reaction to a long, and unfruitful day of shopping.We then spent a lovely evening drinking pink champagne and playing UNO. I'm a still a little sore about this. Some of our family and friends might be aware the fact that Josh and I have an on going Uno tournament. Currently, I am about 400 points behind. But in all fairness it has not as much to do with Josh's skills at Uno as his outrageous luck. Look at the hand he was dealt!

Yeah, look at Josh acting all surprised, like he hadn't stacked the deck....oh, wait....he didn't I dealt him that hand. His luck is just out of control. I played ONE card this hand and picked up...hmmm....let's see 14 cards! It's almost enough to make me turn away from Uno forever, but there's still that part of me that says, "some day you will get your revenge. Patience is a virtue."
So, in closing, send me positive thoughts about winning Uno and if you have any helpful hints pass those along as well. Some day I will crush him like a bug, I'm just building him up so that the day of ultimate destruction will be felt all the more. hee, hee, hee (insert evil laughter here).

This weeks update

sorry, sorry, I know I have been remiss in posting this week so I will try to give a brief recap of this weeks events, with pictures included no less. I know some of you were probably thinking that I'd gone off the deep end this week and sunk so far in my self misery that I couldn't even post, but au contraire mon frère ( isn't it cute how I use inane French sayings that I'm sure the French wouldn't be caught dead saying!?), I have been a rather busy little beaver this week.

Monday: Ok, I can't really remember what I did...which means I probably spent a good deal of my day plopped on the couch, knitting and hanging with the dogs. Oh! I did finally finish knitting my lace-knit shawl, which I've been working on for ages (since, like, March or something). I don't have a picture now, but I'll post some soon. for any interested parties. And I spilled red wine all over my laptop keyboard thus effectively making have the letters no longer able to function - see that's why I didn't post anything; I COULDN'T! Josh just brought me a keyboard he "borrowed" from work.

Tuesday: Went into Geneva for yet another IAC art exhibit meeting. This lasted nearly 3 hours and at least a few things got accomplished. I am relieved to find that there are now others who share my worries about an opening night of February 6. They have now decided perhaps April would be better. Ok, ok, it's not 2009 like I would have wanted, but it's a few more months at least. Keep your fingers crossed that I don't go psycho on these people and their good works.
Tuesday night it started snowing. Yay! Josh and Ally went nuts - like 2 kids in a candy store hyped up on sugar. Josh and I had our first snowball fight of the season- I, of course, lost. Hey, you try and win against him.



Wednesday: My wonderful husband took the morning off because we were expecting a delivery of firewood at about 10:00 a.m. While we waited we entertained ourselves and the dogs by building a snow man. It had snowed continuously throughout the night and was still snowing at 7:30 a.m. when I took Ally for a walk. She LOVES the snow. I let her off her leash in an open field near us and she just started tearing around like you wouldn't believe. It was wonderful. I hadn't seen her that excited in quite some time! Ally and Picasso tried to help with the snowman building, but their idea of lending a helping paw was to pounce on the snow as we attempted to roll it into gigantic balls. Here's our snowman, a little melted since I didn't take the picture till Thursday - but he's still standing. And here is Josh taking his aggression out on that poor, defenseless snowman! Finally, after we were getting a bit cold and it had started to rain - more of a light, but persistent misting - the firewood delivery showed up. Only an hour later than the time we were told to expect them - this is extraordinarily punctual in French time. We're lucky we weren't waiting till 5:00 p.m.! So, after lots of hand gesturing and vapid smiling and head nodding I paid the bill, indicated where we wanted the wood dumped - he was a bit mystified as to why we wanted it deposited directly in front of the gate to our apartment. He tried to tell me it would block the entrance, but I just smiled and said, "oui, je sais." (yes, I know) and then pointed to where we were going to be moving it too. He smiled uncertainly and dumped the wood where I wanted it. He took off, with a parting commiseration over the dreary weather and how wet we were going to be hauling that wood around. See, I can understand French when I really try - I just can't make any sensible replies! oh well. Ok, I have more pictures and more to write...but, I'm starving so I will post again later
Ciao!!! I leave you with an image of Foreman Ally observing the finished work of her crew!

p.s.

I promise I'll post some good pictures soon. That will give you the much needed break from my endless whining.

Why it sucks to live in a foreign country...

1.) they speak another language. Why does this suck? Because I suck at speaking another language. Yeah, yeah I can manage hi, good-bye, thank you, and please. In fact, I can even string together a few phrases when necessary, but when you speak like a 3 year old it's very difficult to actually converse with actual French people.
Don't get me wrong, the people themselves are very nice about my total inability to speak French, the national language of France - where I LIVE. But they don't exactly want to be my friend.

2.) It is difficult to find a job when you don't have a work permit. And it's difficult to become motivated when all you see is an endless string of hassles and disappointments ahead of you. Yeah, yeah the rational part of my brain says, "If you don't try you'll never get a job." But, the irrational part of me also says, "yeah, but if you never try you won't fail. If you don't fail you won't feel bad about yourself." Then I burst into tears at my complete inability to function like a normal, rational human being!
hey, as Free to Be You and Me taught us, "it's alright to cry". And no, Carol, I am not pregnant. I've always been an emotional roller coaster - just ask my family! Feel sorry for Josh, he has to deal with it now.
It sucks because I know that if we were living in the States I could do something, even temping. I might not like it but I'd feel like I was more than a waste of space and money.

3.) The Euro is KILLING the American dollar. This wouldn't be so bad if the only working member of our household wasn't paid in US dollars, but thatis not the case here. (hmmm...did that make sense to anyone? did I make a double negative which makes it a positive meaning he is paid in Euros? - no idea so for clarification our income is wholly in US dollars at the moment).
Which only adds stress upon #2, my total inability to look for a job.

4.) It is so difficult to meet people. See #'s 1, 2, & 3 and it's even clearer - no language skills, no job, no money to go out. Add onto that my already hermit like tendencies and you get disaster. It's like this for me every time I move, but at least in the past I spoke the same language as the people I met. I don't know why I thought it would be any different here. I always think that I'll change, I'll be more adventurous, live life to the fullest...but let's face it I'm a big wuss. I just hide away in my apartment and cry myself silly. (really don't be stressed about all the crying, I'm a strong believer in the fact that it's the fault of being the youngest child, I cry at everything -even, occasionally, commercials).
You may think that I'm over exaggerating but I'm not. Seriously, it took nearly 4 years of living in Williamsburg before I made friends with people who weren't Josh's friends first. Sad, but true.

5.)Living on the boarder of 2 countries, while sounding totally cool (especially to Americans,) is a pain in the F'ing ass. You heard me. If both countries were members of the EU maybe it wouldn't be a problem, but good ole Switzerland, land of neutrality won't join up. So, here in France everything is in Euros and they are not pleasant about accepting other currency. And in Switzerland, of course, they use the Swiss Franc. Every time you leave the goddamn house you need to shove Euros (€)in one pocket and Francs (CHF) in the other. Inevitably when you forget one that's the only currency the store or restaurant will take! ugh. I don't even want to go into the hassle of lugging around all those coins. geeze, I'm not even going to go there right now.

6.) Good chocolate and good wine are readily available. At first glance this seems like the upside to living in France (and sometimes it is), but if you remember those hermit like tendencies you'll realize this a bad, bad thing. If I'm not careful there is a real possibility that I could turn into a blimp-sized, chocoholic, wine-o, who mumbles in broken French, and smells strongly of dog.

You may laugh now, but just wait until the day I truly become "CRAZY Aunt Mel" (insert evil laughter followed by sobbing here - just kidding I'm not crying...at the moment)
Ok well, that's enough misery for today. Really, I'm fine. It's just been a long, lonely week. I'll give you all the high points of living in a foreign country next week. Right now I need to go stuff my face before Josh gets home to whisk me away to Tango class. Good thing we don't have any wine in the house otherwise he might come home to find me hunkered down on the couch swigging straight from the bottle. (Just kidding, mom, seriously don't worry, I'm joking...)

Scary Tales my foot!

Oh, I am so angry at Colonial Williamsburg at this moment. Or more precisely at however edited their new ghost story book, Witches and Ghosts, Pirates and Thieves, Murder and Mayhem: Scary Tales from Colonial Williamsburg. Before I left Colonial Williamsburg I was asked, as a storyteller for their Legends program, to submit my story for a compilation of legends told at Colonial Williamsburg. I agreed, wrote out my story, told them I didn't know how well it would translate into print seeing as I use my voice to add lots of sound effects to the telling. It was accepted and I was notified that it would be included in the new book. Today I received the book. I am so pissed off I could cry. My story has been totally rewritten, there are about 3 sentences that I wrote and the rest is totally different. And, it's utter crap. I am so embarrassed to have my name attached to it! Everyone else's stories look fine. Why on earth did they mutilate mine? I would have rather they just told me they couldn't use mine, instead of rewriting and attaching my name to it. Seriously, I'm tempted to write them and make them take my name out of any further printings. uuuuughhh, I am so angry I'm going to go throw something or punch my pillow.

Attack of the killer goats...

...and sheep, oh and one donkey too! Killer goats, in France? you might well query. And I state, emphatically, bien sur (of course). Ok, ok, here's the story. It was a gorgeous, sunny, fall day today. The beam detector that Josh has been slaving over all week is out of commission till Monday and thus, we have the day to ourselves. We decided to take advantage of this beautiful weather to do a little hiking around our house. There are many yet unexplored trails near us, so off we set. Marion, our neighbor had told us of a trail that leads west of us (at least I think it's west, I'm rather directionally challenged) to a neighboring town called Thoiry. Perfect for a nice walk with Ally. We find the path and head off, following the lovely little signs placed sporadically around indicating yes we are on a path and yes Thoiry is still that way. Eventually we come to a little gate, we go through it and find ourselves in a field full of what a appear to be sheep. Upon closer inspection we discover there are lots of sheep, a bunch of goats, and a stray donkey munching away on the grass.
The animals stare fascinated at us, or maybe it's Ally that transfixes them, but they stop and stare not moving a muscle until we are safely to the other side of the field and out the fence. We continue happily along our walk for, oh about an hour or so, when we are back to the fence leading into the goat/sheep field.
Only this time ALL the animals are directly in our path! There is no going around them. We start forward and they back off, as they should, making way for their superiors! But then, they decide it would be great fun to follow after us. hmmm...goats don't bite do they? Was going through my head, when in front of me Josh says, "C'mon Ally let's go" and they start running! Josh claims this was a maneuver to scare the goats blocking our path so that they would move out of the way, which, I will admit, he succeeded in doing. Unfortunately, he also succeeded in getting all the goats and sheep behind us to start running straight for us! Aaaahhhhh. Their comin' straight for us, or more precisely ME!
With a little shriek, I yelled, "Don't run, they're running after us!" To which Josh responded by speeding up. I could feel the fetid breath of the goats on my back as I too took to my heels and made a mad dash to the gate. What ever happened to no man left behind?!? If I can only get through the gate these crazy goats can't get me. I heaved a sigh of relief as I safely slammed the gate behind me. I turned on my DH (usually meaning darling husband, but I think at the moment he could be more accurately described as devil husband) and said, "what was that about?" He smiled and said, "I had to save Ally." What? You sacrificed your wife to killer goats to save your dog? THAT IS JUST PLAIN WRONG! His defense is that she is smaller than I am, the goats could have trampled her and besides, I was right behind him, wasn't I? Wouldn't he have felt bad if his poor wife had tripped and been ground to a bloody pulp under the cloven hooves of a pack of demon goats? Sure, but the dog would have been safe.

Ooo la, la....

...what have I gotten myself into? In my desperate search to find either: a.) a job or b.) at least some way to occupy my time that involves humans instead of dogs; I came upon this posting on glocs.com (an on-line community for English speakers in the Geneva area) requesting people to volunteer to help organize an art exhibit featuring African artists, which would support a group called the Inter-African Committee (IAC). This organization focuses on promoting awareness of harmful traditional practices in Africa, such as Female Genital Mutilation (FGM). I thought, "wow, what a great cause. I have some free time, I'll see if they still need some help." In my mind they were looking for people to be bodies to help set-up their already planned art exhibit. Boy, oh boy, I could not have been more wrong!
By organizing, they meant from scratch. And now, because everyone in my family is a bunch of suckers and I'm no exception, I am involved up to my eyeballs. Don't get me wrong I think that it is a wonderful cause, but what the hell do I know about finding African artists, sponsors, gallery space, and all that jazz? Absolutely nothing. Looks like, though I am volunteering my time, I have definitely found a project. Pray that it all turns out alright.
I'm happy to help, but I can't stop this nagging feeling that this whole project is just going to bomb. The people involved really don't know anymore about trying to organize this thing than I do and have thought even less about the expenses. When I asked if they had a budget or had worked up a projected costs budget they stared at me blankly and asked if I could do it. Aaaiiiiyaaaaiiiiy!
So my Friday has been spent trying to figure out what sort of costs would go into this sort of project. Unfortunately, I don't even know where to start with projected cost figures! Right now I just have a very pretty excel spreadsheet with colorful headings and formulas that have no numbers to calculate. I can just feel the success, can't you?
Well, I best be getting back to my budgeting...can I just tell you I have become the budget making queen. Budget for the wedding, household budget, now African art exhibit budget...anyone else need a budget, just give me a call.
Oh and did I mention they want to have this little exhibit on February 6? Oh yeah, and it's purpose is mainly as a fundraiser for the IAC! I think they are wee bit crazy, but I'm doing my best to make it all work.
Wish me luck!

Blown Away

Whoa, if you watch Dancing with the Stars were you as blown away that Sabrina and Mark got kicked off as I was? Wow. I'm still shocked. They aren't my favorite dance couple, but you gotta admit the girl can dance. I definitely thought she was going to make it to the end. Then again, as I saw who was in the bottom two I'll confess that I was hoping Cameron would make it through. Hey, he may not be as good a dancer as the Cheetah gal, but he's sure makes some nice eye candy. Tell me I'm wrong. Ladies, you know you were thinking the same thing, "it'll be a shame to lose such a hot piece o' ass." Don't lie, you were too thinking it. I did feel bad for Sabrina though - she looked like she was going to cry. And what's going on with those two? Thanks baby and I love you. A wee bit weird if you ask me. Could there be more to this duo than just dancing? hmmm...
Yeah, so I finally watched DWTS and I'm so, so happy that I didn't ruin it by looking at the website yesterday, as you know I was tempted to do. But, alas, that is all I have to say for the moment. Ciao!